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Legendy mówią, że to badanie nie do zniesienia. Informacja szpitalna również uprzedza, że zabieg może być bolesny. Na pewno dla tych, którzy mają problemy z jelitami oraz w przypadku tych, którym już jelita operowano. Po kilku opowieściach o przerażającym bólu, byłam radykalnym przeciwnikiem badania bez znieczulenia.

 – Ja nigdy nie pozwolę sobie zrobić czegoś takiego bez znieczulenia! To jakieś molestowanie pacjentów! – Prawie krzyczałam za każdym razem słysząc o tym, że ktoś nie był w stanie dokończyć badania.

No i trafiło na mnie.

Błagającym głosem prosiłam lekarkę na oddziale gastroenterologii, żeby mnie znieczulono.

– Proszę pani, proszę nam zaufać. – usłyszałam. – Robimy po dwadzieścia takich zabiegów dziennie i nikt nie płacze z bólu. Owszem, zdarzają się przypadki, kiedy nie ma wyjścia.

W pani przypadku negocjacje są zakończone. 😊

Zaczęłam moje oczyszczanie o godzinie dwudziestej, kiedy to zadowolona pani pielęgniarka wparadowała z dzbanem dwulitrowym nibywody.

–  Teraz do dzieła! – uśmiechnęła się jeszcze szerzej. – Jak pani to wypije, to proszę do nas przyjść po jeszcze jeden litr.

Czułam się jak na zawodach picia piwa w czeskiej gospodzie. Ohyda! Pacjentka z sali obok podpowiedziała, żeby dodać cytrynę. Szybki telefon do Przyjaciela i z ulgą wciskałam sok do dzbanka. Bez tego nie dałabym rady wypić trzech litrów płynu o smaku lekko-słodko-mdłym. Nałożyłam słuchawki, włączyłam muzykę i czekałam na bieg wydarzeń.

Już po godzinie zwieracze odbytu przestały mnie słuchać i się zaczęło bieganie. Niektóre sale w szpitalu mają własne łazienki. Ja miałam to szczęście, że moja sala była na końcu korytarza, a na drugim końcu, jakieś 30 – 40 kroków dalej, była toaleta.

Właściwie nie dało się biec. Mogłam ostrożnie iść co chwila szybkim tempem.

Po dwóch rundach poprosiłam o pieluchomajtki. 😊

Były trochę za duże, ale ukryłam falbanki po koszulką. Pupa atrakcyjnie większa i spokój też większy. Przykre to uczucie, jak leci z ciebie niekontrolowanie. Wolałam biegać po korytarzu w pieluchach. Poza tym, na tym oddziale to całkiem normalny styl. 

Zakończyłam moje zadanie siedemnaście minut po północy. Rano został jeszcze jeden litr, ale to już drobiazg. 

– Czy jest już pani wyczyszczona? 

– Nigdy nie byłam bardziej czysta i lekka – westchnęłam. 

Chwilę potem leżałam na boku w Ośrodku Diagnostyki i Leczenia Endoskopowego w szpitalu im.Śniadeckiego – cała spięta i wypięta w seksownych majtach z dziurą w wiadomym miejscu. 

– Miała pani wcześniej takie badanie? – zapytała elegancka pani pielęgniarka z zadbaną fryzurą. Wyglądała jakby wybierała się na wystawną kolację, a nie za chwilę miała oglądać moje jelita.

– Nie, ale słyszałam straszne opowieści i naprawdę się boję. 

– Proszę pani – spojrzała na mnie z łagodnością i pewnością profesjonalisty – my naprawdę lubimy naszą pracę i staramy się, żeby pacjenci mieli względny komfort. Ale do tego potrzebna jest nam pani współpraca. 

– Czyli co mam robić? – zapytałam z nadzieją na jakiś mniejszy ból. 

– Jeśli pani wczoraj mało jadła i dobrze się przeczyściła, to pierwszy krok do sukcesu. A drugi to rozluźnienie. I proszę puszczać bąki. Ile się da. 

Roześmiałam się i obiecałam współpracować. 

– Bo widzi pani – tym razem kontynuował pan doktor, który do nas dołączył – zaobserwowaliśmy, że jakieś siedemdziesiąt procent pacjentów określa to badanie jako takie, które da się znieść. Dwadzieścia część nie daje rady i rzeczywiście albo musimy powtarzać, albo pracować w znieczuleniu anestezjologicznym. Najmniejsza liczba, to ci, którzy mówią, że to całkiem przyjemne badanie. Ciekaw jestem, do której grupy pani należy. 

Sympatyczna dwójka rzeczywiście wyglądała na zgrany team. Team, który pracuje nad – powiedzmy niezbyt pachnącą częścią naszego ciała. A jednak podchodzą do pacjenta z delikatnością i zaangażowaniem.

Kolonoskopia to badanie diagnostyczne, przy którym lekarz wchodzi przez odbyt do jelita grubego giętkim kolonoskopem. Podczas badania pobiera się wycinki, można też leczyć – czyli usuwać potworki, które nie są nam potrzebne. Rurka jest faktycznie giętka i miękka. Lekarz patrzy w ekran i widzi …. tunel.   

Gdy udało się przejść pierwszy najtrudniejszy odcinek, mogłam się odwrócić na plecy i oglądać w monitorze moje wnętrze.☺  

– Widzę, że pan tutaj ma widok jak w jakiejś grze komputerowej, panie doktorze. – zagadnęłam widząc tor wyścigowy w postaci tunelu i krążącą po zakrętach jakąś końcówkę. 

– Przecież zawsze wszystkim mówię, że w pracy ciągle łapię stworki na lasso – zaśmiał się lekarz. – O! Jest jakieś maleństwo. 

Pani Bożena podała doktorowi jakiś element i zobaczyłam na ekranie małą pętelkę. Ta oplotła grzybka i pociągnęła. 

–  Co to było? – byłam z jednej strony zafascynowana technologią i umiejętnościami personelu, a z drugiej trochę zaniepokojona znaleziskiem.

– To taki polipek. Znajdujemy je u większości ludzi. Kolonoskopia powinna być obowiązkowa po czterdziestce. Po pięćdziesiątce czasem jest trochę za późno, bo u niektórych ludzi te polipy rosną i zamieniają się w mniej przyjazne formy. Wie pani, stres robi duże spustoszenie w organizmie. 

– No tak – westchnęłam – moje strachy wybrały sobie inne miejsce.

Po piętnastu minutach już mi się nie chciało gapić w ekran, więc położyłam sobie ręce pod głowę, zamknęłam oczy i skoncentrowałam się na odczuwaniu śmiesznego gmerania w kiszkach. 

– Czy wszystko w porządku? Co pani tak ucichła? – zapytała pani pielęgniarka. 

– U was jak u dentysty. Można sobie leżeć, relaksować się i słuchać, czy boli. – zrobiłam głęboki wdech powietrza w płuca i wydech innego powietrza drugą stroną. 

– Chyba już wiem, do jakiej grupy pacjentów pani należy – uśmiechnął się doktor. 

Lekarze i pielęgniarki na Oddziale Gastroenterologii, Hepatologii i Chorób Wewnętrznych z Ośrodkiem Diagnostyki i Leczenia Endoskopowego w szpitalu Wojewódzkim im. Śniadeckiego w Białymstoku to specjaliści wysokiej klasy. Kolonoskopia bez znieczulenia? Jasne! Tylko luźniutko i puszczamy gazy bez zażenowania. Na pewno należy dokładnie przeczytać instrukcję przygotowania i jeśli się czegoś nie rozumie, dokładnie dopytać personel. 

Co daje kolonoskopia?  Na przykład wykrycie form nowotworowych w jelitach we wczesnej fazie oraz ich usunięcie bez niepotrzebnego cięcia. Cóż, sami wiecie, że to może uratować Wasze życie. 

Proszę, przewiń w dół, aby skomentować. 

Ilustracja nie przedstawia prawdziwego obrazu kolonoskopowego. Jest moim wyobrażeniem. Skorzystałam z: https://roastmygame.com/game/tunnel-jet-racing

515 komentarz

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